Catching Up

Over the last week or so I have had many things pop into my head that I wanted to blog about. Experiences that I had or things I read. I finally have a second to get it all down. I will start on a good note with something that happened earlier in the week that mae me feel so good about what I do. I had a friend who has had a bit of a struggle with her first baby who was born in March. I have answered her questions many times and tried my best to help in anyway that I could. I gave her “The Attachment Parenting Book” by Dr. Sears about a week ago. Earlier this week when we saw each other again she told me how thankful she was that I had shared that with her. she told me that the night before it was given to her (via my mom who is actually her next door neighbor) she had been on the phone with her mom and she told me that all of her family is unsupportive of her gentle parenting style. They have told her that her son needs to be on a bottle and sleeping alone in his crib all night even if he has to cry. Her son is not even 3 mo. old! She said that all of those things feel wrong to her and she was not only thankful for my continued encouragement but to have all of her feelings validated by a book writen by a doctor no less. It had come at the perfect timeing and given her that bit of strength to continue on her path even without family support.

On another good note I was happy to read a post from The Path Less Taken about Facebook Parenting and discipline. The post was focused on the recent outburst of parents humiliating their children over social media as a form of “discipline.” Whether it is a father shooting his daughter’s lap top or a mother setting an embarrasing status on her son’s Facebook it is not something that should be glorified. I remember the first time I saw this form of humiliation discipline. I was driving to visit my parents several years ago and there was a child standing on a busy street outside of their condo complex wearing a sign saying something like “I am a bad child because I do not want to go to school” or something like that. I was shocked! How horrible. My mom and I could not believe what we were seeing. We both thought that was awfull! I was glad that The Path Less Taken took a stand on this issue.

Now to the not great stuff. I recently met my cousin’s baby for the first time. She was born just two weeks before my son. Everyone had told me she was a very high need baby and that she screamed all of the time. She is and she does! My cousin is at her wits end and I feel so bad not being able to offer much support or advice in that category. I do not feel that my suggestions would do anything but instil guilt anyway and that is not something I want to do. Her home is very stressful. I did not even fully notice it until I had left but when I did I was overwhelmed with the feeling of anxiety. I am hoping that by helping her find support from other moms of high need babies I can help. Then this morning I read that one of my FB friends someone who I would not consider a friend outside of FB, announced that she has scheduled her c-section. Now let me say that I am not sure of teh circumstances and I am simply going off her percieved sense of excitement about it. Why do people do this!? How could anyone be excited about major abdominal surgery with many complications for both the mother and baby? I will never understand it. But everyone’s journey is different.

I am thankful for how easy my pregnancies, births and my children are. i wish every woman was blessed in that way.

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2 thoughts on “Catching Up

  1. Dr. Sears has another book, “The Fussy Baby Book,” all about high-needs babies. I wonder if your cousin would be into reading that.
    It’s great that you got to help your friend. I’m always sad to hear about new mom’s being pressured into doing what doesn’t feel right, especially by family. I still can’t understand why people push it.

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